The exercises on relationships were a little difficult for me; I don’t like to admit that a relationship I have is in need of work, and the fact that the exercises called me to label someone a “problem person” made it hard to do. Yet, after I got past this, I had an eye-opening heart to heart with my fiancée. I have been wanting more power, recognition, and freedom. I told my fiancée what I really wanted during the take aim exercises on page 180.
We had a long discussion that started with Halloween. This upcoming Halloween will be the first one that I have been in the United States for in the past 4 years. This is also the first Halloween that I will have trick-or-treaters on my own doorstep. I want to relax, decorate the house a little, and see the costumes. I asked what Myrna wanted to do for Halloween, and she wanted to see the trick-or-treeters, and also go to a Halloween Party and meet some new people. We realized that although we wanted different things, we can do both.
I had to explain the exercise to Myrna, and hand her the IPOH book, turned to the list of needs (page 8). It was interesting to hear her go through the needs and examples, and talk about what she feels is going on in our relationship. I was surprised to hear some of what she said, and I made a few realizations about why we had a few of our previous arguments.
Brain storming
17 years ago
3 comments:
Andrew:
Funny thing happend this weekend. My husband and I had an arguement. A very rare thing with us. This one just happened to be about communication.
I had said something this weekend to him about our son going out on a school night and he misinterpreted the message. He thought I was being illogical about my decision and had not taken into accout we had let him do it before. I had to remind him I had thought about it and because he had not been feeling up to snuff and had been "on the go" so to speak since Thursday. It was a logical decision in my mind.
Everything worked itself out and we identified our communication channels and methods of communication were not working.
Jen
That is awesome Andrew! having heart to hearts certainly clean things up.
I hope the best costumes come to your door Halloween night and the Great pumpkin leaves you alone!
My husband was born on Halloween. Now that our youngest will not be going trick or treating my husband is quite disappointed. His remark, "What are WE going to do for Halloween then?"
We live in such a rural area we never have trick or treaters.
I've got our problem solved though. We'll be traveling south on Halloween to attend a football game - Air Force vs Army at Westpoint and sitting in the end zone with other Air Force Academy Graduates Saturday. He'll love that.
Enjoy the holiday, it is one of those few where people can't get upset about it.
Halloween is one of the best holidays is it not? I lived off a rural road for most of my life as a young child and never had a single trick-or-treater visit.
I have also had some interesting heart-to-heart conversations with my wife regarding this book. It has sparked some amazing conversations about what we are individually and what we can be together. Mostly, like you touched on, I realized that we can like different things but be happy and do activities together.
Best of luck to you and have fun with the holiday horror.
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